We used to have a saying at work "there are no problems, only opportunities". It was a great way of looking at things from a different perspective, and forced us to come up with alternatives rather than just giving up.
It can be a natural tendency, when something happens that you are not familiar with or you have not planned for, to look at it as a problem. In this situation, you may feel trapped, and you may find yourself playing the "yes, but" game. This is when someone suggests a possible solution to your 'problem' and you answer with "Yes, but ..." "I don't have the time"; "I don't have the money"; "It interferes with xyz". The list of reasons can be long and varied, and even though you genuinely want to find a solution, the "yes, but" game stops you from seeing all the possibilities, keeps you feeling the situation is hopeless and just confirms that you are right.
The solution to the "yes, but" game is to play the "yes, and" game. The "yes, and" game forces you to think of positive solutions. Substituting "but" with "and" is more likely to get you thinking of what could work. Give yourself permission to be really creative, to interrupt your old thinking patterns and to allow new ideas to come through. You might surprise yourself with the outcome! If you allow yourself to see possibilities, your wish that the situation was different starts to become a goal that you can work towards. Automatically, you feel lighter, more positive ... because you have possibilities.
Once you have come up with your possibilities, it's time to decide on the one that you feel best fits the current situation, and start taking action. This might mean calling on the support of someone else, doing some research, making a phone call - whatever it is, take that first step without delay, remembering to think in a mindset of "yes, and".
Have fun with it, and let me know how it goes!
It can be a natural tendency, when something happens that you are not familiar with or you have not planned for, to look at it as a problem. In this situation, you may feel trapped, and you may find yourself playing the "yes, but" game. This is when someone suggests a possible solution to your 'problem' and you answer with "Yes, but ..." "I don't have the time"; "I don't have the money"; "It interferes with xyz". The list of reasons can be long and varied, and even though you genuinely want to find a solution, the "yes, but" game stops you from seeing all the possibilities, keeps you feeling the situation is hopeless and just confirms that you are right.
The solution to the "yes, but" game is to play the "yes, and" game. The "yes, and" game forces you to think of positive solutions. Substituting "but" with "and" is more likely to get you thinking of what could work. Give yourself permission to be really creative, to interrupt your old thinking patterns and to allow new ideas to come through. You might surprise yourself with the outcome! If you allow yourself to see possibilities, your wish that the situation was different starts to become a goal that you can work towards. Automatically, you feel lighter, more positive ... because you have possibilities.
Once you have come up with your possibilities, it's time to decide on the one that you feel best fits the current situation, and start taking action. This might mean calling on the support of someone else, doing some research, making a phone call - whatever it is, take that first step without delay, remembering to think in a mindset of "yes, and".
Have fun with it, and let me know how it goes!

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